Every fall, the same question comes up in every family: do we have the kids for Thanksgiving this year? Then again in December. The answer changes from year to year, and that is exactly why nobody remembers it.
Why holidays are so confusing
Most custody orders don't use the normal weekend schedule for holidays. They set a separate plan that takes over for those days. A few patterns show up again and again:
- Even and odd years. One home has Thanksgiving in even years, the other in odd years. Next year it flips.
- Split holidays. Christmas is often cut into two halves. One home has the first half, the other has the second half, and the halves switch each year.
- Every year the same. Some days, like Mother's Day and Father's Day weekends, often go to the same home every year.
- Birthdays and special days. Some orders give each parent a few hours on a kid's birthday, even when it's not their day.
Your own order decides which of these you have. If something in this article is different from your order, your order wins.
The holidays most families plan around
| Holiday | How it's often split |
|---|---|
| Thanksgiving | Even and odd years |
| Christmas | Two halves that switch each year |
| Spring break | Even and odd years |
| Mother's Day weekend | Mom every year |
| Father's Day weekend | Dad every year |
| Summer | Weeks you pick ahead of time |
See this year's holidays in one place
KidNights reads the holiday rules from your order and lays them out for the year. Open Holidays in the menu:
- Pick the year at the top.
- Each holiday is one row, with a column for Mom and a column for Dad.
- A check shows who has the kids. The date and the time it starts sit right under the holiday's name.
- Switch between List and Calendar to see the holidays on the month.
Holidays: every holiday this year, with a check in the column of the home that has the kids.
When this year is different
Sometimes both homes agree to swap a holiday just once. Maybe Grandpa's 80th birthday lands on the other home's Easter. You don't want to change the order, only this year.
Tap Edit on the Holidays screen, change the check, and save. The fix is for that year only. Next year goes back to what the order says.
For a holiday split into halves, you can check both columns and pick who has the morning. The night goes to the home that has the afternoon.
Plan the holidays early
Holiday trips fill up fast, and so do family calendars. A few habits make the season calmer:
- Look at the whole year in January. Know which big holidays are yours before anyone asks.
- Share your family link. Grandparents can see which holidays the kids are with you without texting you. See Give grandparents their own code.
- Plan the off year too. A holiday without the kids can still be special. Move your celebration to the next weekend you have them. Kids don't mind having Thanksgiving twice.
Key takeaways
- Most holidays switch every year, often by even and odd years.
- Christmas is often split into two halves.
- KidNights shows this year's holidays in one list, Mom and Dad side by side.
- A one-year swap stays in that year. Next year follows the order again.
Questions families ask
Does a holiday beat a normal weekend?
In most orders, yes. The holiday plan takes over for those days, then the regular schedule picks back up. Check your own order to be sure.
What if our order splits a day in half?
KidNights handles half days. The morning goes to one home and the night goes to the home with the afternoon.
Can my parents see the holidays?
Yes. Anyone with your family code sees when the kids are with you, including holidays.